Covid-19

Cheerio 2020

Well, 2020 was a doozy, wasn't it? I wrote a bit about my experience during the first lockdown before - remember that? We thought, or perhaps just hoped, that we were out of the woods by that point and life would merrily if slowly, come back to normal. I mean, LOL! At this point, I feel like that old lady in the Titanic wearily announcing “It’s been 84 years…”.

While my first lockdown was filled with making music, reading books about music and taking online music courses, the autumn one was filled with fanatic cooking and baking. Nigella Lawson has always been a huge inspiration for me (I’m pretty much convinced by this point that we’re the same person) but Lockdown #2 took it to new heights. I couldn’t tell whether these were the signs of me transforming into a fully-fledged “domestic goddess” in my 40s, or that a nervous breakdown was imminent. Still, nobody in my flat was complaining, obviously, and being in the kitchen really helped my overall mental health and became an outlet for creativity. Post-Christmas restrictions, however, just plunged me into a state of numbness. Needing an escape, and not being able to plan a physical one, I’ve been reading about Old Hollywood and watching movies from that era (Gilda, Sunset Boulevard, Jezebel, etc). There is something comforting about getting lost in that world. I also found a brilliant YouTube channel with video essays diving into the history of women in Hollywood through the prism of Academy Awards. Not that I’m obsessive about things or anything.

I do miss working and being creative but have been trying not to think about it or look too far ahead. 2020 has been a challenge and an eye-opening experience for everyone (I didn’t realise I had so many epidemiologists on my social media for example) but it’s over now and despite it being generally shit I still managed to take some photos I’m happy with and here’s a selection of them:

And I loved working with Tam Dean Burn on this music video for Louise Rutkowski:

ALBUMS OF 2020
Róisín Machine Róisín Murphy
What’s Your Pleasure? Jessie Ware
Gaslighter The Chicks
Future Nostalgia Dua Lipa
Women In Music Pt. III HAIM
That's How Rumors… Margo Price
Jaguar Victoria Monét

SONGS OF 2020
Murphy’s Law Róisín Machine
No Time To Die Billie Eilish
Levitating Dua Lipa
Ooh La La Jessie Ware
Midnight Sky Miley Cyrus
Gaslighter The Chicks

Justyna Jablonska

The shoot with cellist Justyna Jablonska was meant to happen in March this year but, like many other projects, it was postponed until it was safe to do it. You know, something about a pandemic. When I was finally on the train to Edinburgh for our rescheduled shoot after the restrictions had been lifted, I realised I hadn't missed taking photos at all and begun to wonder whether I still had it in me. I wasn’t even sure whether I was interested in photography anymore. I know it may sound like crazy talk, but crazy seems to be the operative word for 2020 and it was genuinely what was going through my head sitting on that train (mask on, thank you very much).

During the lockdown, I was lucky enough to be healthy and have money to get by (was also eligible for the self-employment income support scheme) and after the initial panic, I decided to make the best of a bad situation. I found a strange comfort in knowing that we were all in the same boat and that there was absolutely nothing I could do. So I did things I don't normally have the time to do - took some online courses (music theory and such), read books (Maya Angelou, soul trilogy by Stuart Cosgrove and Ronan Farrow’s brilliant Catch and Kill among others), I messed around with music, played the guitar - you get the picture. I missed swimming but overall it wasn’t hard going for me.

Anyway, 5 minutes into this post-lockdown shoot with Justyna, I felt an overwhelming sensation of being in the right place, at the right time, doing what felt right. Perhaps it wasn’t so much that I didn’t miss photography, it’s just that I needed some time off to realise how much I actually loved it. Justyna and I had a great time, we shot outdoors and in her flat, it was easy and fun and we’ve already got other projects in the pipeline together. Check out some of the images below for the time being:

GEAR
Nikon D850
Nikkor 85mm f1.4
Nikkor 50mm f1.4
Neewer 120cm Octabox
Profoto A1
Profoto Air Remote TTL-N for Nikon